- I said of laughter, “It is mad,” and of pleasure, “What use is it?” -
I have the funniest family in the world.
No seriously, I do. We spend most of our time laughing together. A lot of that is my dad and brother’s doing.
When I was young, I was distinctly not funny. To the point my dad, brother, and yes dear old mom would tell me to stop making jokes.
Humor is an art I learned, mainly because I had a family skilled in it.
I’ve always seen it as a tool. It’s a way to make friends, to prove I’m witty, and to make business happen.
American culture is one of joy. The Dream? It’s not an idea of a singular state of being, with all of your possessions and a nice house to die in.
It’s the idea that all is possible required that you tap into the joy of being uniquely you.
Is there risk involved? Sure. Is anything guaranteed? Hardly. But, it’s the first place in the world where individuals can be masters of their fate.
One of the reasons American art and our social interactions are filled with humor is because of that dream. Why are we so loud? Maybe it’s cause we’re so thrilled at being alive.
As there is much to admire in a culture that is filled with joy, it can also bring along the darker sides found in happiness.
Joy is a life empowered by its aim. Happiness is an emotional state based on current conditions.
I can be unhappy and filled with joy. I can be happy and not know joy.
They share similar places in our lexicon, but wisdom knows their dividing line.
With so fine a difference, many can pursue happiness, thinking that it’s joy. They can make themselves quickly in hedonists looking for the next party, the next experience, the next distraction.
No, I’m not talking about sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll. I’m talking about never learning the value of discipline, putting off hard conversations, and contentment with no purpose.
There is a social power to humor, as if it’s a glue that binds us together (the inside joke) or a way to communicate expertise with humor (sarcasm in its most useful form).
It’s the most comfortable form of the human experience to engage in with others.
Does laughter tell someone you care? Does it make people feel heard? Does having a good time fix anything but the present moment?
Now, I’m not saying this means lock yourself up in a room when your friends get together or be a bummer at every social gathering.
What I’m saying is prepare yourself and your heart to be more to others than just a smile or a joke. Dig into their problems and their hurts. Practice doing so in group settings, so you can learn how to do it without embarrassing others.
Sadly, my memory regarding social engagements is limited. I can read a book and hold onto information from it for years. What you and I did yesterday? Sorry, but I forget it immediately.
Could my thoughts on this verse be my own bias? Maybe. I think it’s fair to consider it.
Or rather, I may be like all of you when I think about the most impactful, special, and cherished moments of my life.
Strangely, I’m not laughing in any of them.